Definitions

Mate, Friend, Buddy, Pal, acquaintance, enemy, colleague, special friend, partner, girlfriend, Boyfriend etc.

It is interesting how some people put a lot of stock in certain words. Interesting too when someone asks you to classify your relationship with someone. Sometimes you don't want to put them in a box, sometimes you don't want to admit how special they are, sometimes you don't realize how special to you they are and sometimes you have not decided yet, or you have a relationship that transcends several categories

Quite often after putting your relationship with that person "in a box" for the benefit of the enquirer, you realize their definition of that label is totally different.

"No he is not my boyfriend"

I have a friend interstate that has been "seeing" a guy for about 8 months now, they spend a lot of time together, they have sex etc. She cringes at calling this guy her boyfriend and always corrects anyone who so refers to him. She has a n idea that by actually admitting (even to her self) that they are serious that things will change and not for the better. In contrast both her and I have another friend who is very young and 3 months into a relationship was looking at real estate together, going on overseas trips etc. When in discussion with her about something the other day I said well he is not your husband, and she said well he practically is!

"They are a work Friend"

This is one that can at times really get my goat. Some people have the concept that you have your real friends and then your work friends. Now while this can be true, there will always be friends at work that you would not socialize with outside of work for various reasons. But Having moved interstate, work is where I have found some of my best friends. Many have moved on to other work places now or even interstate/overseas but they are still good friends.



"No they are just a friend"

The eternal answer to the eternal question, "so is there something going on between you too?" How often do you have to clarify that there is actually nothing going on and just because a person is attractive looking does not mean you want to get into their pants?

"A Fuck Buddy"

A reasonably new and on the surface a very honest tag. I have to say however that I have never been in a "Fuck buddy" sety up where both partners are just happy to have sex every now and again. Almost always one partner will have deeper feelings for the other and they will be hoping to expand on the relationship. The worst bit is when the other partner knows this (and I have been guilty of this) and by clearly stating that they don't want a relationship they salve their conscience and will continue using the other knowing full well that the other party wants more and is hanging on to whatever you are giving them, when the healthy thing would be for both partners to move on.

Could go on for every but enough on this topic.

JP